Saturday, September 28, 2013

Children Are An Heritage

Can I just say...I love my children so much.

I pinch myself (mentally) everyday to make sure I'm actually their mom.

God has blessed me above and beyond.  I cannot believe he has gifted me with such amazing gifts, two from my womb and one from another's womb!

"Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord..." Psalm 127:3a
heritage= something inherited, an heirloom; an estate

God has given me 3 of His heirlooms!!  WOAH!!  

It blows my brain cells to think that at one point in my life I didn't want any more children.  Don't get me wrong, I always wanted to be a mommy, just not when God wanted me to be a mommy.  
Did you know there is only a certain time in a female's life she is able to produce children?  As time goes by it gets harder and harder for her to conceive as she has less and less eggs.  I wanted to wait several years after we were married to have children...I may not have been able to if we would have waited like OUR plans were.  God in His Sovereignty gave us Ellie before WE were ready...praise His name He did! 

  I was saddened the other day when I saw the August 12, 2013 edition of Time magazine laying on a waiting room table and realized that could have been me.  It caught my eye and I quickly picked it up...

The world tells us that children are a burden that keep us from having fun and hinder us from living out our dreams.  So so so sad that we have fallen so far from God's Word.

"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD; and the fruit of the womb is his reward.  As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are the children of the youth.  Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them; they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate." Psalm 127:3-5

I wonder how many "rewards" God had waiting for me that I said "No." to.  Praise the Lord in His mercy and grace He had a different plan for me.

  We mommies sure do get tired of mommyhood while we're in the thick of it.  It's hard to remember that our time of nurturing these lil ones is quickly fleeting.

I am greatly encouraged by the ministry, Above Rubies by Nancy Campbell.
If you get a chance, sign up to receive her free magazine.

She has some amazing articles on us, as ladies, and how God made us.

Thank you Father for blessing me with 3 of your amazing gifts.  You are so Sovereign.

Friday, September 27, 2013


Divorce sounds like such a quick fix to hard problems in marriage.

But over and over I'm reminded...that God has a bigger plan.

I'm not saying that it will never happen to us again.  We are human just like everyone else and while we are alive on this earth we are not ever immune to sin and its consequences.

We have been going through a hard spot in our marriage, and God promises if we keep pressing on, in Him, He will see us through with His plan for our lives.

(I almost put the word "but" where I placed the word "and".  In learning about my co dependence, I am taught that often, I need to replace the word, "but", with the word, "and".  I'm starting to like this!  :)

"If thou wilt diligently hearken to the voice of the LORD thy God, and wilt do that which is right in his sight, and wilt give ear to his commandments, and keep all his statutes, I will put none of these diseases upon thee, which I have brought upon the Egyptians: for I am the LORD that healeth thee."
Exodus 15:26

Divorce brings on a whole new set of problems added to the ones already in place.  If there are children involved...what about them?  

"For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy."  1 Corinthians 7:14

So is this saying, the children are holy (=pure), because the believing spouse stays with the unbelieving spouse?  So what's the opposite?  If the believing spouse divorces the unbelieving spouse, the children become unpure...?  
Just a thought~ quite an interesting one!

Also, something to think about, divorce doesn't just affect the two involved in the has lasting effects on future generations!  

I urge you...before you even consider the "D" word, please do everything possible. For desperate situations, a legal separation may be in order~ 1 Corinthians 7:5 "Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency." and 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 "And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife...."  Our Father's heart hurts to see His children feel the consequences of divorce.

 When things feel like there is no hope, do not trust your feelings...they are fleeting.  Only God's Word never changes!  
"The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever."  Isaiah 40:8

 Check out Deuteronomy 28 and see how the Lord will bless you when you "hearken diligently unto the voice of the Lord thy God, to observe and to do all his commandments which He commands us...pretty cool!

Don't give up on life or your spouse, keep going, our God is worth it!

Thursday, September 5, 2013

I'm "Codependent"


My name is Tonya. 

I am a grateful believer and follower of the Lord Jesus Christ 
and I deal with codependency. 

Yep, that's what the Lord is working on in my life right now.

...and, no, it's not fun. 
"For my soul is full of troubles:" Psalm 88:3a

You see, the Lord graciously revealed this idol (codependency upon other people and not Him) in my life to me about 6 years ago when we had the privileged of speaking with our wonderful counselor Randy Storms.  Randy worked a great deal with me concerning my codependency.  Now that Randy is gone...I've been slacking . 

 Just like Priscilla Shirer says in my Gideon study I'm going through right now, "opening myself up to their [sins] removal would require an uncomfortable transformation I didn't want to deal with right then.  So I just didn't."

A codependent person is = "one who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior.", Melody Beattie from the book "Codependent No More".

I find myself living in my codependency when my
 feelings and choices are defined by others reactions instead of God's truth.

Praise my Heavenly Daddy, He is so Patient to keep working with me concerning this lie I have believed.  He is The Only One worth basing my feeling and reactions upon.  

It's so amazing how I've been going thru my Gideon study, and how God has lined it up perfectly in my life concerning my situation dealing with my CD (codependency)!  Priscilla even says, "Gideon is operating now on his own, reacting to the actions or inaction of others instead of staying steadfast to Yahweh's instructions."   (concerning Judges 8:15-17) Yep, that describes me!

...more from my study :
"Seeking God and His will must remain our constant desire and aspiration, even after we've begun seeing His strength demonstrated in our lives.  Otherwise, we will be submerged beneath the momentum of human approval, momentary convenience, personal desires, or misplaced ambitions."  ~ Priscilla Shirer, Gideon.  

I love Jesus' example of NOT living co-dependently in Mark 1: 35-38
"And in the morning, rising up a great while before day, he went out, and departed into a solitary place, and there prayed.  And Simon and they that were with him followed after him.  And when they had found him, they said unto him, All men seek for thee.  And he said unto them,  Let us go into the next towns, that I may preach there also: for therefore came I forth."

Jesus wasn't concerned who He was going to offend by not going back into the town to follow their agenda, He was on a mission for His Father... to tell others of Him.  I too pray He will bring me to that place...

Codependent No More!

Philippians 3:13b-14
"forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."